As Easter approaches, I can't help but reflect on the past. I always get extra sad and emotional with each holiday. All of the happy memories come flooding back and then the reality of what will never be also hits me. I watch Ava getting so excited about coloring Easter eggs and remember how much fun Aspen used to have every holiday. He loved coloring Easter eggs and of course racing Jenner around the yard trying to find more than his big brother. Oh and the candy. He loved candy.  We went to an Easter celebration last year where there were lots of fun things for the kids, including the Easter Bunny. He had no interest in any of it and was glued to my side as he always was at public gatherings. Oh and the Easter Bunny photos last year were hilarious. Jenner struggled to keep him on his lap while Aspen was trying to reach for me. I will cherish that picture forever. I can tell Jenner is sad as he's been watching shows that Aspen loved, Paw Patrol, Tom & Jerry's Wizard of Oz and Curious George. He's been bringing him up a lot more lately too, which I love! I still haven't pulled out our Easter decorations - it's too much for me, but I know it's only a matter of time, before I have to go hunting for Jenner's Easter basket. Aspen and Jenner had matching baskets. I remember back to Christmas when we decided to put Aspen's stocking out, I feel like I need to do the same for Easter. I don't ever want Aspen to feel like he is being left out - he will always be part of our family. I pray that I can bring a smile to the weekend and not be as sad and depressed as I was over Christmas. We have a lot to be thankful for and that is what I'm going to focus on.